I am the one in the hole
I'M A DISGUSTING WORTHLESS BILGESACK ON THE GARGANTUAN TEAT OF A LABORING, LEPROUS MUSCLEBEAST. MY SELF ESTEEM IS SO SMALL, ITS EXISTENCE IS A MATTER OF CONJECTURE AMONG THEORETICAL PHYSICISTS. I SMELL SO BAD, THE STENCH CANNOT BE EXPRESSED WITH EVEN THE MOST ELOQUENT, FLORID LANGUAGE. THE ODOR MY BODY MAKES HAS MADE POETS CRY. I HAVE WON SPECIAL AWARDS FOR DISCOVERING NEW PLACES TO TOUCH MYSELF EROTICALLY WHILE FARTING. I UNFAIRLY PULVERIZE THE COMPETITION IN ASSHOLE PAGEANTS, AND I HAVE RECEIVED A LIFETIME BAN FROM UGLY CONTESTS BY PRESIDENT SHITFACE HIMSELF. MY BLOOD IS NOT FIT TO FLOW THROUGH A SEWER, AND MY SIGN IS A PICTOGRAPHIC SYMBOL THAT LOOSELY TRANSLATES AS "PLEASE HIKE THESE PANTS UP TO THIS GUY'S ARMPITS, CHAIN HIM TO A FLOGGING JUT, AND MAKE A FUCKING EXAMPLE OUT OF THIS SORRY SACK OF SHIT." WHEN I LOOK IN A MIRROR, MY REFLECTION SLOWLY SHAKES HIS HEAD WHILE I WET MYSELF IN SHAME.

jinglestan:

i am very much alive

and i intend to stay that way

Dunno, I still say she looked prettier when she was dead.

But it is good to see her smiling anyway.

18 Jun '12 | 10:45am |16,877 notes
via:itsaipha | ori:jinglerambles
  1. housebytheriver reblogged this from chickenstab
  2. rockbottomascension reblogged this from ask-sis-strider413
  3. arquiiu reblogged this from princesslu25
  4. princesslu25 reblogged this from ask-sis-strider413
  5. ask-sis-strider413 reblogged this from veterancosmiccrocker
  6. veterancosmiccrocker reblogged this from purpledragoncaptor
  7. lausagi reblogged this from beta-jada
  8. lextazy reblogged this from shabnakh-adyr
  9. shabnakh-adyr reblogged this from gummydicksandpixiestixs
  10. suejean168 reblogged this from cubes-and-tea
  11. spillingthefarm reblogged this from jinglerambles
  12. tiitaniite-crow2 reblogged this from cubes-and-tea
  13. cubes-and-tea reblogged this from your-math-homework
  14. theflamearcher reblogged this from candyredterezii
  15. scythe-meister-erik reblogged this from shiroibird
  16. optimisticantpile reblogged this from thehomosexuals
  17. sweetproxy reblogged this from unbalanced-contrivance
  18. unbalanced-contrivance reblogged this from animeasuka
  19. ladykittylynn reblogged this from royaldelirium
  20. ellexkayy reblogged this from until-nirvana
  21. until-nirvana reblogged this from homestuck-arts
  22. g4m3rg1rllatula reblogged this from heroprincesslucina
  23. animeasuka reblogged this from icosahedrone
  24. personbehindthepen reblogged this from heroprincesslucina
  25. hop-on-the-huss-bus reblogged this from your-math-homework
  26. gonecrazy-backin5 reblogged this from the-foxiest-box
  27. sauciness-and-wenches reblogged this from your-math-homework
  28. devilfeliciavargas reblogged this from your-math-homework
  29. hetaliarandom reblogged this from your-math-homework